INTRODUCTION

A MESSAGE FROM DAME EDNA, MBE

At Dame Edna's Finishing School for Uncouth Canines, we recognize that, without a doubt, our canine friends are the noblest of all animals. Our dogs love us unconditionally; they honour, obey, and protect us. The mind of a well-trained dog is focused solely only on pleasing its master or mistress, and will endure any hardship, humiliation, or unpleasantness in the world for the owner they love. We believe that every dog trained at Dame Edna's has what it takes to be a champion, and whether show quality purebred or loveable mutt, a Dame Edna dog will always bring home a blue ribbon to its owner.

THE DAME EDNA DOG

At Dame Edna's, we firmly believe that there are no bad dogs, only uncouth ones. Be they the mangiest mongrel or pedigreed purebred Pekinese, our 12 step programs can turn the most uncouth canine into the perfect pooch. We can train your pedigree dog to be Best of Show, or prevent your pet from piddling on the carpet. At Dame Edna's, your wish is our command.

THE DAME EDNA CLIENT

You love your pet as a member of your family and your constant companion. As such, you only want what is best for it. You are well-versed in the attributes of proper breeding. You are self-confident, self-motivated, and energetic. You demand obedience and respect. You will not settle for second best, and you understand the value of quality education. You know the right school can be the difference between success or failure in the dog-eat-dog world of canine competition.

THE DAME EDNA SCHOOL

Established in 1897, the Dame Edna School has been certified by the United Kennel Club since 1902 and maintains a close relationship with them. The school is the recipient of many prestigious awards, including the Copper Corgi in 1952 and the Thatcher Iron Cross for Discipline in 1987. Our school matriculates only the finest animals, be they pet or show quality. Our rigorous training is second-to-none, and our graduates have reached the highest echelons of championship success. Our clients include Bridgette Bardot, Sir Edward Toppenhatt, and the late Princess Margaret, whose Dame Edna trained prize Corgis "Gin" and "Tequila" were fixtures in the Royal Palace for many years.

THE ROYAL ROGER CHAMPIONSHIP PROGRAM

The Royal Roger Championship Program (RRCP) represents the highest achievement for your dog. Certified by the United Kennel Club, the RRCP is the Ph.D. for prospective purebred pups. It is the benchmark for obedience training in the United Kingdom. RRCP dogs have appeared in motion pictures, the theatre, and on television. To enroll in the RRCP, dogs must undergo a thorough screening process and have their pedigree verifed by the UKC. The difficult and strenuous training regimen ensures only the finest dogs make the grade. Discriminating owners can rest assured. An RRCP-certified dog is more than merely trained; it is conditioned for excellence.

SHOWING YOUR DOG - THE TRICKS OF THE TRADE

What kind of people show dogs? Dog people have their own answer: you don't have to be crazy to enjoy dog shows, but it certainly helps! Whether showing dogs as a weekend hobby or in competitions worldwide, this peculiar - and fascinating - sport provides something for everyone who loves dogs. A show dog represents the highest standard of training, intelligence, discipline, obedience, and pedigree for its breed. As such, a show dog is a highly valued commodity, although any show dog breeder, owner, and handler will readily attest that, despite the hardships, disappointments and pitfalls of the sport, showing their dog is not about profit; it is a labour of love.

USING OUR THESAURUS

As in all aspects of life, knowing the right thing to say at the proper time is the difference between the couth and uncouth dog lover. The strange and wonderful world of championship dog showing has a rich and complex language all its own. Therefore, we suggest that, in order to avoid embarrassing social mishaps, you take a moment to peruse our handy thesaurus to familiarize yourself with the terminology.

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